Call to action

I have had a stirring lately. I can feel it. God calling me back home. Not that I've been horribly off course, but I haven't been 10 & 2 like he wants me. But as always, he never gives up, and lately I've heard him calling me home. This time though, I can hear the specifics. The 'I want you in my WORD. I want you to KNOW my stories. I want you to GIVE. I want you to not FEAR. ' I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that God wants me to spend this time in preparation. Missions is heavy on my heart. I am ready. I have been ready, but I've been scared. But my heart knows it is time to prepare. To pray. To research. To be willing. I don't have a resounding 'missions abroad' vision, however, that may be where he's calling me. I've always felt a strong local calling. Maybe that's from growing up in my house where my mom was always opening her hands, abilities, heart, time, and pocketbook to anyone around her that could use some encouragement, money, food, shelter, clothing. She has a heart to care and love for her community. I can only hope this is hereditary!

Here is my confession: I live in constant fear. This is the obstacle that I struggle with the most in my walk of faith. I am used to having everything that I want (key word) and am so grateful for that.. and for my parents hard work their whole lives. The last few years have definitely been spent in the season of need. Only what is needed. Asking for batteries and lightbulbs for Christmas because anything outside of our needs seems... unnecessary. I have gotten familiar in this lifestyle and ultimately it has molded me so much. I am conscious of what we spend. I'm always looking for ways to save. I don't need much outside of the basic necessities. That sounds confident, but behind that lifestyle, I cower in fear. What if the money runs out? Why did we spend so much on this? I can't put money into my retirement account, what's going to happen when I'm old?

Useless spinning of my wheels and lack of faith in my Provider. Where do you see in all of this... 'What can I give?' I have justified time and time again that we have nothing to give. I do my part at Christmas. We clean out the house and give to charity, but what do I really GIVE. Who am i teaching about Jesus? When am I His hands and feet? Who am I winning into eternity? Why am I not more concerned about my fellow brother and sisters well being? I am concerned. Terribly. But I claim 'not me' when I feel the tug at my heart to help.

This video changed me today. Called me into action. This is the beginning of my season of preparation. I have much. MUCH. Whether in deeds or service or food or money, I will help. My eternity is in tact. Heaven awaits me. Why worry about myself?

What about the starving? What if my child were starving? Nothing could stop me from providing for her. These are my brothers and sisters in this world, my own flesh and blood. Starving. Why would I not give all of me to feed them/ heal them/ clothe them/ introduce them to our Savior?

This is what is going on in my life. God is calling. What a glorious voice to hear! Praise His name forever and ever!  And I am ready. I am listening. I am preparing for what's ahead. Fear, get behind me. I have more important things to focus on now.



Isaiah 58

⁶ “Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen:
to loose the chains of injustice
   and untie the cords of the yoke,
to set the oppressed free
   and break every yoke?
⁷ Is it not to share your food with the hungry
   and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter—
when you see the naked, to clothe them,
   and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood?
⁸ Then your light will break forth like the dawn,
   and your healing will quickly appear;
then your righteousness^[a] will go before you,
   and the glory of the LORD will be your rear guard.
⁹ Then you will call, and the LORD will answer;
   you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.
   “If you do away with the yoke of oppression,
   with the pointing finger and malicious talk,
¹⁰ and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry
   and satisfy the needs of the oppressed,
then your light will rise in the darkness,
   and your night will become like the noonday.
¹¹ The LORD will guide you always;
   he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land
   and will strengthen your frame.
You will be like a well-watered garden,
   like a spring whose waters never fail.
¹² Your people will rebuild the ancient ruins
   and will raise up the age-old foundations;
you will be called Repairer of Broken Walls,
   Restorer of Streets with Dwellings.